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    Halloween Music For Your Phobias

    Halloween is the time of year where many of our fears and phobias come to life. Haunted houses, hay rides and corn mazes can be found in nearly every city. Horror movies dominate network TV. And let’s not forget to be very wary of the life-size butler holding a serving tray when you walk past him in the grocery store, as you know that at any moment you will be met with glowing red eyes and a good verbal accosting.

    Of course, music plays a key role in enhancing the season, playing upon those fears and phobias that thrill and chill us.  So, we’ve decided to make a list of HALLOWEEN MUSIC that people with certain kinds of phobias may want to avoid… or not.  Explore at your own risk!  Muhahahahahaaaa!

    Hemophobia – fear of blood.  We recommend avoiding Feed Me (Git It) from Alan Menken’s Little Shop of Horrors.  This is especially true if you also suffer from Botanophobia (fear of plants).

    Arachnophobia – fear of spiders.  Robert Smith’s hushed vocals in The Cure’s Lullaby may make the hair on the back of your neck stand up when he tells you that “The spider man is having you for dinner tonight.”  Eep!

    Lilapsophobia – fear of tornadoes and hurricanes.  With its apocalyptic theme, CCR’s Bad Moon Rising does a fine job of bringing the terrors of natural disaster to life.

    Lyssophobia – fear of going mad.  They’re Coming to Take Me Away from ’70s group Napoleon XIV may not be all that frightening in the traditional sense, however you would be hard-pressed to find a song that embodies a maniacal state as well as this one does. “Ha ha , ho ho, he he…”

    Osmophobia – fear of smells or odors.  In addition to the “funk of forty thousand years” assailing your senses, we’re pretty sure that between the song itself and the amazing video for Michael Jackson’s Thriller, you’re bound to encounter pretty much every phobia in existence.  I mean, there’s a very good chance that Vincent Priceophobia became a real condition immediately following its release!

    Wiccaphobia – fear of witches and witchcraft.  Paul Dukas’ epic orchestral work The Sorcerer’s Apprentice was inspired by a poem of the same name by Johann Wolfgan v0n Goethe, published in 1797.  The poem was brought to life in Disney’s 1940 film Fantasia, but the concert piece itself had already been highly popular with classical audiences for quite some time.

    Elurophobia – fear of cats.  When it comes to cats, no song does a better job of describing the baddest of the bad, the “monster of depravity,” like Macavity:  The Mystery Cat from Andrew Lloyd Webber’s famous musical… you guessed it… Cats!

    Euphobia – fear of hearing good news.  If you suffer from this condition, then you may not be rejoicing with your “fellow Ozians” when they proclaim “Good news… the witch of the West is dead!” in the opening scene of Stephen Schwartz’ hit musical, Wicked.  But don’t worry, once you move past No One Mourns the Wicked, you will come to discover the bad news – she’s not actually dead.  Except that this bad news actually turns out to be good news because, in reality, the witch really isn’t bad.  Are you confused yet?

    Nyctophobia – fear of the dark.  We don’t think there’s a better song to describe your phobia than Iron Maiden’s Fear of the Dark.  Perhaps, rather than avoiding, you should actually give it a listen.  It may very well be theraputic to know that you’re keeping (phobic) company with these pioneers of British metal.

    Melophobia – fear or hatred of music.  Um… we really hate to be the bearers of bad news, but you’re reading the wrong blog.  Please, don’t panic.  Take a deep breath, calmly move your cursor toward the “X” at the top of your browser, and click.  If you experience any technical difficulties while performing this action, or find yourself traumatized from reading this blog, please don’t hesitate to contact our tech team at satisfaction@jwpepper.com.  We can help!

    Uranophobia – fear of heaven.  While some may find solace in the idea of angels looking out for you every hour of every day, those who are afflicted with this particular phobia may not enjoy reciting the children’s song Angels Watching Over Me.  It just goes to show that music really is open to interpretation.

    Samhainophobia – fear of Halloween.  Danny Elfman goes into great detail describing an entire town named after the holiday in This is Halloween from The Nightmare Before Christmas.  Resident ghosts, ghouls, witches, vampires, corpses and clowns all make cameos in this song.  The good news?  We’re fairly certain that real estate is cheap.

    Iatrophobia – fear of doctors.  The Witch Doctor by David Seville may seem like a fun, lighthearted, kooky little ditty.  But you just ask anyone who suffers from Iatro-wicca-phobia how THEY feel about it!

    Cleisiophobia – fear of being locked in an enclosed place.  If Eminem’s lyrics for ’97 Bonnie and Clyde aren’t disturbing enough, check out Tori Amos’ cover and see how you feel about the song then.  Amos spins the perspective to that of the dead woman who is now riding in the locked trunk of her murderer/ex-husband’s car, listening to the conversation he is having with their young daughter.  Positively chilling.

    If you’re interested in exploring even more phobias, then check out www.phobialist.com.  If you now have an urge to add some creepy sheet music to your library, then look no further:  http://bitly.com/TQDIKP.  Happy Halloween to all you non-Samhainophobes!

    Mandy Kubikhttp://jwpepper.com
    Singer/Songwriter; Keyboard, Piano, Flute Player; Certified Associate Recording Engineer/Producer; Music Advocate; Regional Manager, J.W. Pepper, Michigan

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